Collaborative Poem Results and Miscellenary…

We didn’t get to twentylines but here’s the poem (with my imposed stanzas):

When counting the hairs remember one thing
Often forgotten when you shrink back inside
It’s skin you rub not the itch
Embroidered in fire along the slim spaces between muscle and bone
A thousand missteps wishing to be untold

The rainbow formed by the prism of sweat delights the mite.
But I lick away the rain at day
Standing gratefully, at ease, blindfolded
But, lo, the dove mourns the tide.

And, lo, the squirrel finds not the bone.
Hare Krishna, Hare Rama, Hare Hare!
Get out of my laboratory, you Rats of NIMH!
That a lady must pluck with ease!

Beard sheddings, leaving a trail through life
Not one number has ever turned white, but keeps the blur of color …
fading into the rain, the sadness of oil slicks on supermarket pavement
when all is said and done, minoxidil is still $27 a month

Nothing left but to pandiculate

Many thanks to bonehound,ghostsandrobots. bearsir. sixty4k. bigredpaul. tycho_anomaly. rootbear1. benpanced. tim_e_bear. danbearnyc. rogueboi. ovedio. greasybiker. ink_ling. final_girl. thormyc and f8n_begorrafor participating

In other news:
Annals of adolescent fixation department:
Today the Wonderbra is ten years old and Doungeons and Dragons turns 30. On a related note, Lucy Lawless still doesn’t have a new TV Series.

On the subway today I was whiling away my time with Samantha Fox’s greatest hits. For a while now I’ve been contemplating writing a novel and began to envision a scene in it that plays out against the backdrop of Samantha’s “I Surrender” here are the lyrics:

I’ve got a secret I can’t keep
That burns inside when I’m in my sleep
I try to hide from your memory
But you come back & it’s haunting me
What will I find in this fantasy
If I go with me now will you set me free
And I surrender to the spirit of the night
I surrender (I surrender)
The darkness is my lover
And nights of pleasure
So I surrender (I surrender) to the spirit of the night
I take cover from the light of day
But you keep calling and I obey
I don’t remember where I have been
But you come back to me in my dreams
What will I find in this fantasy
If I go with me now will you set me free
I surrender
I go crazy when the sun goes down
And it takes control as I hit the town
I give my body to the heat of the night
And there’s no man judge if it’s wrong or right
Big city lights pouring down like rain

It makes me wet that someone got paid for writing that.

and then here’s another song that’s been running through my head:

I’m an artist honey
you’ll see me sometimes
making crazy pictures out of music and rhymes
Costume changes
performed with poise
Dancing in formation
with a couple of boys
I take them on the road
with my reel-to-reels
I’m an artist honey
You know how that feels?

It’s the greatest show
with the best effects
since Disco-Tex
and the Sexelettes

It’s the greatest show
with the best effects
since Disco-Tex
and the Sexelettes

It’s all about wonder
the power to be
like thunder expressing electricity

It’s the greatest show
with the best effects
since Disco-Tex
and the Sexelettes

Disco-Tex and the Sexelettes

Call it performance
call it art
I call it disaster
if the tapes don’t start
I’ve put all my life
into live lip-sync
I’m an artist honey
You gonna get me a drink?

It’s the greatest show
with the best effects
since Disco-Tex
and the Sexelettes

It’s all about wonder
the power to be
like thunder expressing electricity

It’s the greatest show
with the best effects
since Disco-Tex
and the Sexelettes

Disco-Tex and the Sexelettes

Pet Shop Boys – “Electricity”

one of the times when Neil’s delivery is perfectly suited to the material.

Conservatives like to rail about the rise of paganism and feminism, but notice how you never hear about Green Goddess dressing anymore?

And finally, for now:
All you West Coasters may have had Hairrison, but as of tomorrow a bunch of us are piling in the car and heading to Briarbash, the annual pipe bear gathering. I for one am squealing with delight, although nobody else seems to have mentioned it much. Two and a half days of pipe smoking, pipe play and pipe shopping. I’m packing some of my funkiest work gear, as well as my new leather cowboy hat.

0 Comments +

  1. Green Goddess Dressing

    1 cup mayonnaise
    ½ cup sour cream
    3 TB. white wine vinegar
    ½ tsp. tarragon
    1 TB. lemon juice
    1/3 cup parsley, chopped
    3 TB. onion, chopped
    3 TB. anchovy filets, mashed
    1 clove garlic, minced
    1 TB. chives, chopped
    2 tsp. capers
    1/8 tsp. ea. salt and pepper

    Directions: Blend all ingredients thoroughly in food processor.

    From The Bears’ Cookbook, 1998

  2. Actually, Saveur Magazine in a recent issue had an article relating to Green Goddess dressing. It’s possible though that Saveur is part of the pro-pagan, eco-feminist, post-faerie conspiracy, so watch out. Here’s my version:

    devldog’s Green Godless dressing

    • 1 bunch green onion
    • 1 bunch parsley
    • 1.5 cups sour cream or creme fraiche
    • 1.5 cups mayo
    • salt
    • pepper
        chop up the first two ingredients in a food processor. mix together the sour cream and mayo. fold in the chopped herbs. salt and pepper to taste. let sit overnight.

        It’s not just for salad! Toss it with warm quartered new potatoes, bacon and hard cooked eggs with a splash of rice vinegar! Use as a chip dip! A sandwich spread!

  3. when i was in high school there was a girl gang called the Green Goddesses, and one night they wrapped my front yard in toilet paper because they didn’t like my sister, and they threw bottles of that salad dressing all over the lawn.

  4. Thank you for posting all this. Your Fun With Lyrics Page reminds me of the fun and I had last night at the The Three Terrors vs. New York City concert, with lyrical gems like “Jenny from the Bronx” as rescored by Kurt Weill, Stephin Merritt doing a spot-on Debbie Harry recreating Blondie’s “Rapture” with a rhythm box, and Stephin’s beautifully plaintive “I’ll Take Manhattan” with novelty instruments and updated lyrics for the usually-cut My Fair Lady reference. Not to mention Lou Reed’s “Chelsea Girls” and “Walk on the Wild Side” that they opened and closed the show with.

    See you in Pennsylvania! We’ll have some Roadside America virgins with us! God Bless Roadside America!!!

  5. Thank you for posting all this. Your Fun With Lyrics Page reminds me of the fun and I had last night at the The Three Terrors vs. New York City concert, with lyrical gems like “Jenny from the Bronx” as rescored by Kurt Weill, Stephin Merritt doing a spot-on Debbie Harry recreating Blondie’s “Rapture” with a rhythm box, and Stephin’s beautifully plaintive “I’ll Take Manhattan” with novelty instruments and updated lyrics for the usually-cut My Fair Lady reference. Not to mention Lou Reed’s “Chelsea Girls” and “Walk on the Wild Side” that they opened and closed the show with.

    See you in Pennsylvania! We’ll have some Roadside America virgins with us! God Bless Roadside America!!!

  6. An equation all can solve

    Pipes + your funkiest work gear + new leather cowboy hat + your own sweet self = the hot.

    The thousands of miles that separate us again becomes a grave pity. Would that I had a fly-proof teleporter.

  7. An equation all can solve

    Pipes + your funkiest work gear + new leather cowboy hat + your own sweet self = the hot.

    The thousands of miles that separate us again becomes a grave pity. Would that I had a fly-proof teleporter.

  8. I don’t care how much hair anyone has on their head as long as they have some nice facial hair (that said, I worry about losing mine, as I have a Gorbachevian stain up there that I fear will resign me to a dotage of baseball caps). But I’ve often thought about getting some Rogaine and trying it on my chest to see if it could get it even hairier. Of course, to see if it actually works, I’d have to do only one side of my chest.

  9. I don’t care how much hair anyone has on their head as long as they have some nice facial hair (that said, I worry about losing mine, as I have a Gorbachevian stain up there that I fear will resign me to a dotage of baseball caps). But I’ve often thought about getting some Rogaine and trying it on my chest to see if it could get it even hairier. Of course, to see if it actually works, I’d have to do only one side of my chest.

  10. What is “pipe play”? Or don’t I want to know?

    The image of a high school girl gang pelting a TP’d lawn with bottles of Green Goddess dressing is something I find endlessly tickling.

  11. What is “pipe play”? Or don’t I want to know?

    The image of a high school girl gang pelting a TP’d lawn with bottles of Green Goddess dressing is something I find endlessly tickling.

  12. I always wanted to use it to put my initials on my back, but more pharmacologically knowledgeable friends (and doctors with no artistic vision) have repeatedly dashed my dreams.

  13. I always wanted to use it to put my initials on my back, but more pharmacologically knowledgeable friends (and doctors with no artistic vision) have repeatedly dashed my dreams.

  14. also, i’m pretty sure that all of them played flute, so i’m sure there was some evil backstabbing and hurt feelings when they were ranked by chairs after tryouts !

  15. also, i’m pretty sure that all of them played flute, so i’m sure there was some evil backstabbing and hurt feelings when they were ranked by chairs after tryouts !

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