Thumpa thumpa…

Lately, every time I click on the update screen I get a slight constriction in my chest. How can I bend this format to my needs at the moment? The hestation I feel is what led to me posting two memes yesterday: when in doubt, flirt.

For those who don’t know, my life is one of great topsy turvy ness these days. I’ve been lucky enough to have some things happen that are making me re-evaluate my personal life. I’m trying to practiice honesty and adventurousness. I know that there is some work that will need to come out of this. It’s been a lot of taking in, and very little putting it out. And yet here it is weeks of me making the same feeble announcements. And I think now I’m actually going to request that you not comment on this post, mostly because I’m suspicious of my own comment cravings here. A little too much asking and not giving. At least another species of it.

Lately I’ve been buying art books: books of other peoples’ sketchbooks, catalogs of old master drawing auctions, photobooks of people having sex and an atlas of human anatomy. I tote around three different blank books everywhere I go, along with a case that contains pens and a full compliment of drawing pencils. Some how I think I’m going to make drawing a more integrated part of my daily life. I can’t tell if it’s working or not. I can see my artistic practice on the other side of an oh so thin glass wall, I can almost touch it, but not.

A quick flash of the studio in my head: I need to start throwinfg some stuff together again – things are feeling too premeditated, too worked out – too plodding. I don’t want to return to the piles of crap everywhere that I used to have, but when I start feeling like this, this constricted, it’s usually a sign that there is something pressing within me and that only my unconciousness can manifest it.

Typing that makes me realize that I have not been giving my work process its due, not honoring it as the best part of myself. It’s time to work towards improvement on that front.

Oh yeah, that’s what this forum can be for.

0 Comments +

  1. Your work

    I have no idea how my visit to nyc oct 28-31 will congeal. But I would very much like to see your work and/or say hello in person if either is possible.

  2. Your work

    I have no idea how my visit to nyc oct 28-31 will congeal. But I would very much like to see your work and/or say hello in person if either is possible.

  3. you can collect the chaos in your head and lay it down or throw i up. you can unleash yourself like a scared dove under a big black hat or pump a load all over a fat canvas….you’ve “been there, done that” doesn’t always fit the challenge, the messages are clear – you just have to close your eyes to the mess every now and then…or click your heels together and laugh your ass off. xo

  4. you can collect the chaos in your head and lay it down or throw i up. you can unleash yourself like a scared dove under a big black hat or pump a load all over a fat canvas….you’ve “been there, done that” doesn’t always fit the challenge, the messages are clear – you just have to close your eyes to the mess every now and then…or click your heels together and laugh your ass off. xo

  5. Many thanks for the words of encouragement. I’m always in this internal wrestling match, but this is the foirst time in a long time that I’ve felt a real block in the work flow.

  6. Maybe thumping tinkerbell is just what I need to do these days…

    And watching me sketch isn’t all that it’s cracked up to be. But I’m sure you’ll have the chance at some point!

  7. Sounds like you need a Muse… or some inspiration… πŸ™‚

    Over the years, I’ve tried to make life less of an all-or-nothing thing to enjoy. I find comfort in the little things as well as the great things that happen around me. Sometimes being happy and feeling satisfied inside changes your entire outlook.

  8. Sounds like you need a Muse… or some inspiration… πŸ™‚

    Over the years, I’ve tried to make life less of an all-or-nothing thing to enjoy. I find comfort in the little things as well as the great things that happen around me. Sometimes being happy and feeling satisfied inside changes your entire outlook.

  9. wise words – I think this post reflects my desider to write through my places of discomfort and incoherence, rather than to just delay reporting until everything is in a tidy package, hence its somewhat pained tone.

    As for muses -easier said than done. I find that if I cultivate the habit, the muse arrives.

  10. wise words – I think this post reflects my desider to write through my places of discomfort and incoherence, rather than to just delay reporting until everything is in a tidy package, hence its somewhat pained tone.

    As for muses -easier said than done. I find that if I cultivate the habit, the muse arrives.

  11. wise words – I think this post reflects my desider to write through my places of discomfort and incoherence, rather than to just delay reporting until everything is in a tidy package, hence its somewhat pained tone.

    As for muses -easier said than done. I find that if I cultivate the habit, the muse arrives.

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