I’ve been around here for 49 years.

I have to say that the past few years have proved to be among the most surprising in all of my life.

As I noted last week, despite occasional gripes, I am one lucky duck. People talk about who they were in their past lives. Even if I believed in reincarnation, I really don’t have any curiosity about other existences, because this one is just too good.

I’ve gotten to do so many of the things, big and small that I hoped to. And I get to be in touch, through this medium, with so many thoughtful, questing minds. I wouldn’t want to be alive any other time.

If you can read this, know that I value knowing you. Have a great day.

A strange day at work where three problems that have been dominating my conciousness for weeks suddenly resolved themselves all in the same hour and in ways that are close to the best possible outcome. Which can only make me ask “what is going on?” and “when does the bad news arrive?”

Five Small Joys From Today:
1 – The flavor of what Hale and Hearty listed as “Boston Baked Bean soup with Smoked Sausage”: it actually reminded me of the baked beans of my youth and the ones I have made.
2 – Hearing my friend George’s voice on the phone as we planned our trip together this weekend. It’s been almost a year.
3 – Actually filing the small heap of papers that had accumulated on my desk
4 – Receiving my dvd of “The Hypnotic Eye”: trashy, quirky, filled with screeching line readings and actresses tearing their own faces off
5 – Being asked to do a job I think is very important. I was surprised that the forces that be would even think to ask me.

Ok, so here it is: I now have three shows up: new work in London, retrospective at the Tang in Saratoga Springs, and collaboarative video installations in San Francisco. So i think i can say that the harvest season is over. Next official deadline: new two channel video piece for group show in Jan. This harks back to what things were like for me twelve years ago, except then I didn’t have the added workload of running a graduate program. I wish I knew some other way to work, to be honest. This week I was frantically getting the videos for SF made into DVDs and fedexed so that they would arrive on time, Meanwhile there was a huge opening in Saratoga, attended by my Mother and Sister as well as a number of friends. After the dinner, I djed a dance party for the Skidmore students, an interesting effort since the record collection I was using started in the early sixties and ended around ’91. Luckily they all came ready to dance, so the only real problem was that their hopping up and down made the turntables skip on occasion.
I think this post should be firmly filed under count your blessings. Although each of these projects brought up wildly varied emotions, moment to moment , each was an oppurtunity I am grateful for:a chance most people in my field don’t have. I wish that I could proceed through them with grace, rather than by causing drama for the other people who work with me. Drama through shutting down and being uncommunicative. Drama through waiting til the last minute. Yes, everything got to where it needed to be at the right time but it still is at the expense of frayed nerves, for people that I know and care about. SO here’s a public apology to everyone who deserves one.

(side note to the shrink: just noticing that I can’t talk about good news without talking about how badly I’ve behaved – that must get a bit tedious for you, eh?)