I Used to think it was a blessing when I could remember my dreams, providing me with valuable glimpses of my turbulent inner life. These days I’m not so sure. My dreams alternate between two scenarios: My wanderings around some sort of college campus and its surrounding environs. Sometimes I’m looking for a place to live, sometimes I’m organizing something. I often take note of the foods available in the cafeteria or surrounding shops. It’s always very clear that this is campus and usually I’m thinking I could make this work. Sometimes I have to move out of the dormroom or studio that I currently occupy and I’m wondering about where to go next. The second scenario is a zombie attack. There is the constant assessment of escape possibilities, triage of victims and relentless chase that you may be familiar with from any number of living dead movies. This is such a constant for me that it no longer is terrifying so much as it is draining, given the sense of no rest and fleeing from place to place for the entire length of the dream.
Last night I alternated between the two kinds and woke up with no sense of rest at all. And I feel like this has been going on with me for months and months now. Always the two options, neither of them providing a resting spot.